Meanjin / Brisbane, So-Called Australia: LNP HQ Attacked by Geriatrics Against Gross Despots (GAGD)

Received on 30.08.19:

It was the early hours of Friday 30 August when a mob of ideologically motivated old-aged pensioners operating under the moniker Geriatrics Against Gross Despots (GAGD), descended on the Liberal National Party’s (LNP) (not the) Queensland headquarters, to express their horror and disgust at the gutless federal coalition government’s draconian and fascistic policies.

Specifically, the motley gaggle of spirited sexagenarians, sprightly septuagenarians, and outraged octogenarians, stated they were demonstrating fury at the LNP litany of oppressive policies and practices, including (but certainly not limited to):

  • inhumane, illegal, and iron-fisted treatment of refugees and asylum seekers, including the indefinite detention of some refugees for more than 10 years, forced deportations, hypocritical and violent boat turn backs and the uniquely ‘Australian’ policy of processing (aka torturing) asylum seekers in offshore camps;
  • perpetuating systemic racism and ongoing colonisation towards First Nation People in occupied ‘Australia’, with highly offensive initiatives such as the 2020 Endeavour replica, ongoing land theft and the refusal to cease celebrating the invasion of Aboriginal land on “Australia Day” [vomit].
  • the influence of accelerationist ‘end of times’ Pentecostal Xtian ideology (exemplified by Prime Minister “ScuMmo”), and the Australian Christian Lobby, on policy and legislation;
  • the calls for an end to ‘religious discrimination’ through the recent proposed Religious Discrimination Act which threatens to supersede exclusion zones outside abortion clinics, puts queer people in harms way and refuses to let queers live their lives in peace;
  • participation in the AmeriKKKan-led antagonisms in the Straight of Hormuz, and historical ‘Australian’ perpetration and complicity in war crimes;
  • raping of the environment and pillaging of natural resources in both ‘Australia’ and internationally (including bullying and stand-over tactics towards developing countries in the Asia and Pacific region to exploit natural resources for the benefit of uber-capitalist LNP cronies) contributing to accelerating climate change related disasters on this continent and around the globe;
  • the widespread and ever increasing use of surveillance technology, including legislation allowing federal bodies access to digital communications with no public oversight or accountability;
  • economic and social marginalisation of welfare recipients, including  ‘quarantined’ welfare payments, cashless welfare cards and proposed urine testing of welfare recipients;
  • and, local LNP support for the repeal of QLD legislation allowing women access to safe, legal abortion. 

The action involved re-decoration of the LNP headquarters with blue and red paint. These colors were symbolically chosen to represent blood on the hands of the LNP, and in tribute to the colors of the West Papuan flag, whose population are currently engaged in an inspirational struggle to resist the tyranny of colonial Indonesian occupation.

The LNP call us the gutless vandals when their presence in our communities makes us want to actually vomit. Their colour scheme is vandalism and their existence is vandalism.

In addition to ameliorating the dullard aesthetics of the LNP HQ, the spavined retirees used expanding foam to destroy the door’s locking mechanisms. This act was both intended to disrupt the activities of the LNP and to represent the LNP policies of ‘locking out’ refugees and asylum seekers.

Additionally, participants in the protest action spray-painted the word “RESIST!” on the LNP office. A member of GAGD said the term encapsulated the desperate need for the ‘Australian’ population to have the courage to challenge the LNP policies and practices using a diversity of tactics. The Geriatrics Against Gross Despots member also stated that “in an image-obsessed society, the most effective strategy for maintaining youthful exuberance  is eternal vigilance to repression. Out of the nursing homes and into the streets comrades! Let  us cast aside our zimmer frames  and dedicate our mo-scos to the burning barricades!

Geriatrics Against Gross Despots (GAGD)



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